I have discovered something about myself on my journey to a more fit life. That ABSOLUTELY ANYTHING IS POSSIBLE! This is me, stretch marks and all. And you know what... I'm okay with that:) I am okay that every inch of me is flawed. I never thought I would say that.
I have been working really hard for a long time, but it is only recently I have been able to put it ALL together. I realized that life is not a perfect science. It's not about depriving yourself, or overdoing, or underdoing things. If I could express what is going on inside me... Today I took a picture, not realizing what it would look like, but when I saw what I looked like I cried WITH JOY! I have been working so hard in all aspects of my life. I have started a business that has had me in tears, and has had me laughing, and excited, and crazy. I exercise because I love the way it makes me feel. I am doing this business because I know I have more to give then what I've been giving. I have made some amazing friends that I wouldn't have made without Beachbody. I think these last few weeks I have been on an emotional roller coaster. What am I trying to say? I hate when I can't get my thoughts down.
I guess what I'm saying is I love what I'm experiencing right now. This isn't necessarily about losing weight, or getting great abs, or being able to run 50 miles. Getting fit has taught me that dreams are possible. That I can do anything! That we all can do anything! That everything I've always had on a pedestal can be realized. That if I am putting my priorities in order that I am blessed. That challenges in life are so worth it even when they feel ridiculously hopeless.
I love Beachbody for giving that to me. And for showing me that anyone can do it, even me! I don't want to sound like a commercial, but I just wanted to tell you that this journey I'm on is incredible. I am making my goals happen, and so far I am thrilled with the results:)
So far my dream wall is working on me, while I'm working on it. Amazing...
Saturday, August 15, 2009
Okay so I have some time to kill, it doesn't happen very often, so I figure why not right down some random thoughts and maybe just maybe I will inspire the masses with my jibberish:) I'm sure it's not likely, but it's worth a shot. Perhaps some wandering reader will find me so inspiring they will want to pay me a million dollars to publish my thoughts. I mean my thoughts have to be worth at least a million, right? Or maybe not, but a gals gotta dream. Which brings me to my thoughts as a child. I love to sing, it kinda runs in the family. My mom always had a made up song she put together from taking a bath and how we wash our bodies, to cleaning our rooms, or whatever, they just came out. I'm proud to say I carry on the tradition and my kids love it. I find Tanner and Keira doing the same thing. Sometimes Keira even makes up her own words. I love it...so where was I, oh yes, I loved to sing as a child. I always thought I was good at it too, so good that I figured if I just walked around singing some recording artist would snatch me up right away and I would make millions. I guess the kid in me will never die. I still think I'm worth millions, maybe not my singing talent, but something else for sure.
Ah another thought. Kelcey and I returned home from our adventure in Lava Hot Springs. It's just this small little town, but it was very fun. We went tubing down the river, and enjoyed the little pockets of warm water gushing out on the side. However, the river itself was shockingly cold. And a word of warning, when you go over the rapids on a tube, lift your bum up in the air or you may get smacked by an angry rock, I still have a tender spot. We then enjoyed their very large pool, the water slides, and the platforms. I'm a very daring individual, at least I thought I was. Being a mother has kind of settled that part a little. Of course, I couldn't just leave the tallest platform just standing there taunting me, so Kelcey and I made our way up. We had to do it at least once or forever be doomed as chickens. Now I've jumped off a platform like this before, so I don't know why I was suddenly so nervous, but I was. I looked down and my stomach got all jittery. Kelcey went first, yes I hang my head in shame. Then it was my turn. I took a leap and I fell for at least 5 MINUTES. Holy cow, I don't remember it ever being that long of a fall before. Just so you know, you have to sign a waver before they will even allow you to climb the stairs. At any rate, obviously, I survived and yes I would definitely do it again. However, my once life long dream of sky diving, has dropped to the bottom two:)
And now for my final thought of the evening...children's bed time. It is the most glorious and celebrated part of the day. It is the moment of true bliss. I think God gave us the need to sleep just so we wouldn't harm our children. Can you imagine a world with no naps, and no bed time? That would be hell. And a very valid reason to do everything possible to make sure you make it to heaven.
Wednesday, August 5, 2009
I know I'm on a roll here with all my blogging lately, but I had to share a very profound and sweet moment. First, I need to preface the wonderful moment.
You all know that I have a massive amount of goals I have been setting, what can I say I like to shoot for the moon. Well, among those goals was one to read my scriptures at least 3 times a week, just so I could create a habit. I also have committed to do a family home evening every week. Well this weeks family home evening was to introduce the importance of work and how it blesses our lives. I created chore charts and behavior charts for the kids to emphasize rewards vs. the scare tactic, which is something I've been using way too much. For those of you who don't know, "the scare tactic" is not very effective. Now that brings me to another one of my goals, which is Be slow to anger.
Here's my chore and behavior charts
Now we've decided that they get 129 points a week, these points include behavior and chores. If they get 95% of those points or higher they receive a $1 at the end of the week. The lower the points, the lower the percentage, and then the lower the money. For example, if they do 50% they get $.50, etc. Now after paying their tithing they can choose to spend the money they earn right away, or they can save it to buy something REALLY cool! It's up to them. You'll notice their names above the charts with numbers. To encourage earning 100%, after going over their charts before bed, if they do 100% of their chores, and earn 100% behavior points they receive a sticker for the day. After earning 10 stickers they get to pick a prize out of the prize bucket. Prizes include things like a pack of gum, fruit snacks, granola bar, a special date with mom or dad, a play date with a special friend, etc.
Well, today after going over the chore chart and giving them a chance to take care of what needed to be taken care of, Keira did not earn 100% today. She kicked Tanner in the face earlier, which was a direct violation to the "Be nice to your siblings" rule. And she did not make her bed. After we read scriptures and said prayers Keira was upset that she didn't earn a sticker. Tanner, bless his sweet little heart, offered to make Keira's bed with her. So we let them, and he did it with such compassion and love writing about it puts tears in my eyes. But you see, she still was missing an X because she kicked Tanner. Earlier we had resolved it and she said she was sorry. Tanner again with such tenderness told me "It's okay Mommy Keira didn't kick me that hard." I said yes, but she kicked you and that's not okay. He then said, "Mom I forgive her." I wrapped my arms around my little boy and told him how proud I was of him, and that he is such a great example. I said that if he felt it was okay for her to get an X on the "Be nice to siblings" square, we would do it. Of course, he agreed. This opened up the opportunity to talk about forgiveness and repentance.
I'm gonna get a little spiritually serious here, but I think I need to say it. Since I have written down my goals it has served as a reminder of the things that are most important in my life. I wake up to them every morning and know what efforts I need to make to make them happen. I have been reading my scriptures every day so far, and we have been having family scripture every night before bed. I want to testify to you of the power of the spirit and the blessing it has been to me personally. I am a strong-willed individual. I'm not one to back down from a fight, or a confrontation. I am loud and I get angry, but these last few weeks I have been a different person. I have been praying diligently that I can have more compassion, and that I can be slow to anger, especially with my children. And so far my prayers have been answered. Everything that I have done with my kids has been pure inspiration. These things I have shared were not my ideas I can assure you. Heavenly Father has had His hand in everything I have done. My world is changing. My attitude is changing and I hope it continues. I am in no way perfect, and I am learning, but I am truly grateful for a loving Heavenly Father that has heard my prayers and has allowed me to realize what I am worth. He cares enough about me to be there in my time of need, and to allow me to realize that this is just the beginning of what can be! To be as a little child, to be meek, humble, and full of love... My son has taught me a huge lesson today and has given new meaning to, "By small and simple things great things shall come to pass." I am so grateful for my children, and that I have been trusted to raise them.