Saturday, May 22, 2010

I Didn't See That Coming!

Things have been a little...different. I went to get my ultrasound on May 14 to find out the news of boy or girl. Now when I say I was convinced it was a girl... I'm talkin' there was no other way around it. It had to be a girl for reasons I have explained to a number of people that I won't go into here:)...Anyway, the news spun me around a little. "It couldn't possibly be a boy! There must be some mistake. Nope I definitely know that boy part, there is no way around it. It's a boy." Now as a side note, I LOVE boys! They aren't as emotional, a little rough and tumble, but so am I so it's no big deal, rough and tumble I mean; being emotional just comes with being a woman so don't judge me:) Just having a girl meant I could be done, which belongs to a story that once again will not be addressed here...sheesh.

Okay so I admit I cried, and started feeling sorry for myself. Will I ever be done having children? What if I have to have 20! My life won't be mine FOREVER! I'm never gonna be done raising children, etc., etc. Just pathetic really. So as I'm crying I suddenly just stop mid-sob...no joke. And I thought you know what, I'm okay. And that was that. So maybe I'll have 5 kids, or whatever. It just goes to show you I'm not the one in charge. And it took me a while to realize I was actually okay with that. That sounds funny, but it's the truth. And then I took a me moment that lasted about a week, to just be still for a while, and take a good look at what was around me. I didn't actually have a conscious thought I'm going to take a week to ponder and be still. It just sort of happened. But this has been the BEST week I've had in a very long time. It's like I finally realized that being a mom is the best thing I've done. Aside from marrying my husband of course. It's challenging, competitive, fun, boring, exhausting, enlivening, peaceful, comfortable, uncomfortable, loud, quiet, busy, silly, crazy, joyful, painful...I bet you could throw any word in there and it could fit. All of these things have brought me joy in some way. I look around and my house is a mess...cluttered. The dishes and laundry are never done. My bed isn't made. The house is lucky to be vacuumed once a month, or mopped for that matter. We only have one bathroom to share with 5 people. Toys are ALWAYS on the floor. The kids have to share a room and because of that they NEVER go to bed on time. The carpet needs to be shampooed desperately. I have a GIANT coffee stain on my carpet, and no I don't drink coffee people. It was a home remedy to get throw-up smell out gone terribly, terribly wrong. That's a story for another time. I could go on and on because the "oh-look-how-bad-I-have-it" list never ends.

So in my week of taking a look I realized my mind is always racing. I put undo stress on myself by the minute. I want to be this or that. And I've gotta be here and be this kind of person by this time. Or I'm failing! I can't, I can't, I can't whatever. It gets exhausting and it sends my emotions on a roller coaster. "Stay out of her way, cuz you never know what mood she'll be in." It's nuts. I realized I am so worried about being wrong about everything. What will "they" think? Will I be liked? Am I doing this right? Do I say too much? Am I too loud, or disruptive, or irreverent, or opinionated, or, or, or, or? It's a lot, and for whatever reason discovering that it was a boy calmed me down considerably. It gave me a reason to be still, and have faith in who I am and my purpose. Why is that? Hmmm

Life's a funny thing. A little unpredictable...

I don't know.
I'm having a boy. And I'm doing a little dance. And I know I'll be fine, even when I'm not. And I smile at my mess, at my kids, and at myself. I'm having a boy, and I'm thrilled:)


Wednesday, May 5, 2010

California Summit


This is us all done up for the awesome dinner and reward show for the Million Dollar Body Game. The guy on the left is Todd. He was a loner too, so we took him under our wings:)
My awesome roomies, minus one, she wasn't there yet. This is just before we were dripping like we jumped into a swimming pool. That's Connie, and Jean.
CEO and Founder of Beachbody Carl Daikeler. They don't get any more genuine than this guy. Without him I wouldn't have a transformation story. He is fantastic!

Man oh Man did I have fun! I met some of the greatest people on earth, and I got to exercise with the best trainers on earth:)

My favorite part was group exercise. We were all packed in a room like sardines and every trainer that Beachbody has took us through 10-15 minutes of hard core work. Don't worry I didn't disappoint...I BROUGHT IT PEOPLE!!!! Pregnant or no pregnant I wasn't pooping out. I gotta say though, by the time Tony Horton came around...it was time to take my camera out for pics:) The whole workout was 1:30. And it was tough, but EXTREMELY exhilarating. I don't think I've ever been so happy! The energy in that room is hard to put into words, but if you've ever been somewhere where everyone felt the exact same way at the exact same time, there's nothing like it. And even after all is said and done and we were dripping in sweat, and I mean dripping...we still had smiles on our faces and couldn't wait for the next workout. So fun!!!

I had no idea who my roommates were, or how we were going to get along, but now we are life-long friends. In fact, I made a lot of friends. I would do it again in a heartbeat.

And the best part:) I got pictures with the man himself and P90X mastermind Tony Horton, the Turbo Queen Chalene Johnson, and CEO and founder of Beachbody Carl Daikeler. Oh and Tanya, I told Chalene what her program did for you, and she is as great in person as she is in her videos, she was so thrilled for you. Get ready cuz she's got a new one coming out called Turbo Fire. We got a taste of it and it is a BLAST!

Anyway...
Chalene just Rocks. I think we're kindred spirit's. Love her!
Yep that's Tony standing by 2 prego's. Just cuz we're pregnant doesn't mean we can't Bring It!

So who's with me for next year's Summit, in LA on June 16-19?! I think I found a yearly tradition. SUCH A BLAST!!! More pictures later.