I had a lovely conversation with Kelcey the other night. I was in one of my ranting moments. By now you know I'm running a business, if you don't... scroll down. Things were not going as I had imagined and because I obsess, this made me rather ornery. My house was a pig sty, my children were fighting, Kelcey wasn't home yet, and I had a training I wanted to attend. So I erupted. Blah, Blah, you, Blah, Blah, you, you! I can be very good at playing the victim. I put the children to bed, and Kelcey finally said, "I love it when you're soooo happy when I get home!" Me..."ROOOOAAAARRRR!"
Now I truly married correctly:) I married a man with an EXTREME amount of patience, and who reads between the lines rather well. He lets me carry on, and gush negativity like Niagra Falls, and he waits, and he listens. He knows that a sparring match will not fix anything and will only add fuel to an already blazing fire. After I vented all my frustration we then began to talk.
It has taken me 2 days to fully grasp our conversation. I was thinking back to when I got a little NUTS with my exercising, and tracking my eating. I wanted that body. I wanted it so bad I was obsessing. I was doing double workouts on top of my hard workouts. I was counting calories. And I was paranoid about everything I put in my mouth. And naturally I was unhappy. Who could be happy living like that? So then I did the opposite, I started eating anything, and everything I wanted. I was kind of careful, but a full plate of brownies was not beyond me. I fell off the wagon for a while. And surprise, surprise, I put on 5 lbs. Thank heavens I was still exercising because it would have been more otherwise. And then one day I had an AH-HA moment. I realized that stressing about food was killing me, and not thinking about it at all was killing me. I needed balance. I began to eat portions. And I kept it simple. And I stopped STRESSING! And guess what happened? I lost 10 lbs! I lost the 5 I put on and the 5 I had been trying to lose for almost a year. I wasn't hungry, I was satisified. I wasn't unhappy, I was thrilled. Fitness is a journey, not a destination! Did you get that? FITNESS IS A JOURNEY, NOT A DESTINATION!!! I am not done. I may have lost those 10 lbs., but I can get stronger, I can be better cardiovascularly(is that a word?) So I now have "INSANITY" in my possession:) This will drive me to Dig Deep, and keep pushing when everything screams STOP!!! What appropriate timing. I have been finding so many parallels between fitness and life, it's a little uncanny, but awesome!
Anyway so back to my story...my conversation with Kelcey revolved around my business, which is my passion. This is a journey not a destination. I may not get there today, or tomorrow, but I am getting there. It doesn't matter if it takes me longer than someone else because I am not someone else. It just matters that I get there. I set the standards, and I get to learn these incredible lessons along the way. I tell you what, I have an incredible story to tell when this is all said and done. Kelcey has been telling me all along, and I finally shut-up long enough to hear it. I can CHOOSE to stress about it and get obsessed and have nothing change, OR I can CHOOSE to enjoy the ride, and finally see those last few "pounds" go where they were meant to go. I am choosing to enjoy the ride. I love fitness, I love exercise, I love Beachbody, and I love talking about it. Does anything else matter? It seems so simple really. Just let it happen...relax...